Music

I don't sing in the shower. Oh, I have. And then I've listened and I've stopped. I'm not the worst singer I've heard; I can carry a tune and I'm on pitch, but people like Scott put me to shame.

I was a decent musician in high school and college. Did marching band, jazz band, concert band, advanced band in HS; marching band in college. I played my parts well enough, tried my best, and it was usually OK.

The one thing I wish I could do is write lyrics. Writing for publication on deadline is different than writing a song. I've tried. I have some decent ideas, but for the most part, the stuff I've tried is fucking lame.

I wish I could write stuff like this:

Duality
Slipknot

I push my fingers into my eyes
It's the only thing
That slowly stops the ache
But it's made of all
The things I have to take
Jesus it never ends
It works it's way inside
If the pain goes on...

I have screamed until my veins collapsed
I've waited as my times elapsed
Now all I do is live with so much fate
I've wished for this
I've bitched at that
I've left behind this little fact
You cannot kill what you did not create
I've gotta say what I've gotta say and then I swear I'll go away
But I cant promise you'll enjoy the noise
I guess I'll save the best for last
My future seems like one big past
You are left with me 'cause you left me no choice

It's not gonna win a Pulitzer or any literary award, but if you've heard the song... there's a rawness and emotion that gets conveyed that I really like.

So, since I can't write music and don't play an instrument any more, I'm left with just one line of defense: My vast iTunes library and the ability to burn CDs.

I used to make mix tapes all the time as a kid. Once I got a CD player (way back in the lat '80s), then it was all about making tapes with the 3 or 4 discs I owned. I got an iMac DV SE in 2000 and then bought an external CD burner. I could burn my own music! That was about when iTunes came out. It was too cool to be able to burn my own CDs for the car.

I had gotten out of the mix-tape habit until I hooked up with Scott. I burned a ton of CDs for him... in the beginning, the songs were put on the disc after careful consideration for the mood or message I wanted to convey. Those CDs left little doubt about my feelings. It's all stuff I had said, but there's something cool about finding a song that conveys what you're feeling.

Anyway, the whole point of all of this is to say I want to get back in the habit of burning mix discs. And to tell those of you who get CDs to not read too much into it. I like to pick a theme and run with it. So hopefully, when I start doing that, you'll like what I've burned for ya. Some of it might be stuff you have, some of it maybe something you've never heard. I just want folks to get a little enjoyment out of it.

Now I need to make time to do this...

Oh, I might be able to take requests. But it's more fun to try new things, don't ya think?