Numbed

I can't feel my face.

OK, more accurately, my tongue feels like it's the size of New Hampshire and my chin feels like it's sticking out about 10 feet from my face. My cheeks... I don't know if I have them any more.

Lucky me, I got two fillings today. It was about an hour in the dentist's chair. I thought they were going to be on the same side, top and bottom. They were both on the bottom, a molar on each side.

Yay.

My mouth was propped open for an hour. Thankfully, the numbness hid the fact my tongue had turned into the Sahara desert. I could tell my upper lip was dry, since I still had feeling there.

The drilling was relatively unpleasant. She used several different drills, or attachments. I know they have different degrees of fineness — the last one she used on each toof felt like it could punch through concrete. Thank dog it didn't go fast.

When it came time to fill these holes, it felt like there were about 20 things in my mouth. For starters, there was a block used to prop open the mouth — there are 4 muscles for biting down, only 1 for keeping it open. Then there was a truckload of cotton, the water thing, the sucky thing, a band around the toof, some wedge things (I couldn't really feel where those went) and then the good doctor poking around.

Opening my eyes just wasn't an option.

Thankfully, the filling part didn't take as long as the drilling, it was just more uncomfortable. Poking, prodding, rinsing, drying. And then they were done. Teef almost as good as new.

We'll see how long it takes for me to get feeling back. My chin is still very numb, cheeks don't exist. While I can't feel my tongue or taste anything, I know it's there since it feels gigantic. It's this mass in my mouth and I feel like I could bite through it. It's pretty weird to bite it and feel no pain. Yeah, no eating for quite some time.

Oh, and talking? Yeah, right. It's like Elmer Fudd, Cartman and Sylvester rolled into one.