Song, other stuff

Found yet another song. Guess who it's from...

In the on-going quest to find balance in my life (which is probably going to result in another tattoo, more in a bit), I find myself listening to the latest offering from Nine Inch Nails a lot. I've been listening to the CD since I got it Tuesday, and I'm not tired of it. Well, technically, I've been listening to it since Saturday when I snagged a bootleg copy. But it's definitely one of those things where the more I listen to it, the more I'm discovering. It's a really solid CD. And it's quite convenient that it fits where I am in my life, at least from a work standpoint.

I'm really trying to take the approach of "things are the way they are" when it comes to the job. There are certain things I can control, but there is no point in wasting the energy or getting stressed out again. Scott said it's a very Zen approach, which is I guess what I'm aiming for. That's not to say there haven't been annoying moments. There's no shortage of those, ever. But for once, I'm not letting myself get caught up in a lot of that. Maybe I'm growing up? Hah. Right. Tell me another one. It's certainly possible to grow without growing up; I know that much.

I needed the time away to recharge and find my bearings. I needed to spend time with the people who matter in my life. I needed time to breathe and I got all of that. I may need the paycheck to survive, but it's the friends, family and loved ones that keep me sane. I've always known that, but I haven't always appreciated it. I appreciate it more than ever and having an incredibly wonderful man in my life makes it easy to remember that. I've also got fantastic friends, new and old, who are willing to put up with my ramblings about how in love I am, or my rantings about work.

Oh, the song... here be lyrics:

Right Where It Belongs
Nine Inch Nails

See the animal in his cage that you built,
Are you sure what side you're on?
Better not look him too closely in the eye,
Are you sure what side of the glass you are on?
See the safety of the life you have built,
Everything where it belongs
Feel the hollowness inside of your heart,
And it's all...right where it belongs

What if everything around you,
Isn't quite as it seems?
What if all the world you think you know,
Is an elaborate dream?
And if you look at your reflection,
Is it all you want it to be?
What if you could look right through the cracks,
Would you find yourself...find yourself afraid to see?

What if all the world's inside of your head?
Just creations of your own
Your devils and your gods all the living and the dead
And you really oughta know
You can live in this illusion
You can choose to believe
You keep looking but you can't find the woods,
Are you hiding in the trees?

What if everything around you,
Isn't quite as it seems?
What if all the world you used to know,
Is an elaborate dream?
And if you look at your reflection,
Is it all you want it to be?
What if you could look right through the cracks,
Would you find yourself...find yourself afraid to see?

There's a lot of stuff to get through in this song. I'm not even sure where to begin with it. I just know it was stuck in my head when I was at the grocery store tonight and I listened to it all the way home (OK, I am a bit obsessive about this CD).

For starters, "And if you look at your reflection/Is it all you want it to be?" — that's what grabbed me. The whole chorus, really, stuck with me. If I answer the question, no, it's not what I want it to be, at least at work. The personal life, I know there can be more, but I really don't have a lot to complain about. We have something some people never find. I sure as hell didn't have it when I was married.

Anyway, that's enough rambling for now. I actually have other stuff I'd like to try and do before I get to sleep. Many web sites to visit and whatnot.

[Edit]
Forgot that I mentioned something up there about a tattoo. This is what I want:

With any luck, it will be that size, maybe a little bigger. I'm thinking left shoulder, just a nice solid black outline. My body seems to handle black ink pretty well. Assuming I get out of bed in time, I'll be heading to the tattoo shop before work and (hopefully) setting an appointment for Monday.